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Schuldig (part 2)

Posted in Black Caste, Mastery with tags Eve, lust, Tanye on March 6, 2010 by crow1971

Crow notices Snow leave and turns to Tanye who lay before his feet. “Rise slave, show me this tent of Snow.”he tells her while he ponders if it was safe enough to stay. He watched Snow go inside and shrugs lightly. There had been enough hostility between them and Snow had more reason to kill him than perhaps any other. The marks he had killed were hardly in a position to come for vengeance and Crow had been quite sure to never leave many witnesses to his deed.

Crow’s thoughts faded when he followed the slave and his eyes travel over the perfect curves she so tauntingly exposed to his view. The tent dark made him stop in his track to give his eyes time to adjust to the dark. “Shadows that hide you.” he mutters softly when he started to look around to see what comforts were in the tent. The furs surely used often, seemed to be piled up highly. Crows grins at the thought of Snow using the slave until she was screaming the birds from the trees nearby. It hadn’t been the rough soil that had made her cry, that much he could figure now.

Crow didn’t speak when the slave whimpered before him, soft pleads up to him. A flick of his fingers, made it quite clear what his intentions were with her. Watching her crawl on all fours to the furs, he started to carefully unwrap himself from the many weapons he carried. Each one he held with the up most care, after all his life had depended on each of them all to often. He made sure that each of them were in reach if needed and the hidden dagger that seemed his life partner he placed next to him when he settled next to the slave.

Crow was pleased that the dark kept her in the shades, perhaps visualizing her to be the pleasure slave he owned or perhaps the girl Sparrow he had sold before she was able to gain more of him as he feared her love more than he had any other opponent. “The priest kings are cruel, slut.” he had hissed when he was ready.

Crow wasn’t a tender lover, roughly and with the sureness of a man that just took his pleasure had not waited and taken her. It had been long that he had allowed himself the weakness of his own flesh. His mouth raped hers while he didn’t seem to be concerned about her readiness. If she was still the wanton slut he had known her for all this time, he doubted she wouldn’t be. With the softness of her skin against his, their mutual sweat as this lubricant that made their movements smooth and almost like this fluent union of lust, his moment had come rather quickly. The overwhelming feeling of his release that had been captured within him for this long, his groans and lustful growls of pleasure had cried out the name of his love: “Eve !!!!!”

Crow unaware of his cries for the woman that had come closer than even his own daughter Rose had been, had pushed the slave from him uncaring if she had her share of pleasure or release. He wasn’t bothered by anything she might desire or think of what had happened. He had turned on his back and allowed himself this moment rest, before he would head off before the day would again start. He wouldn’t stick around for some ‘social breakfast’ there were a few people to see before he would turn his back and walk from what he hoped others would see as going from the face of this planet.

To be continued

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Schuldig (part 1)

Posted in Black Caste, Mastery with tags love, Snow, Tanye on March 5, 2010 by crow1971

This is the last episode of the killer known as Crow …

Crow tortured by the feelings that had washed over him the past weeks, had left Ayr without telling anyone about his departure. It wouldn’t be forever, he had justified himself. The sale of his slave sparrow, the feelings that the lady Eve in Ayr had stirred him in great length and all seemed to indicate something within him was changing. Had he grown soft ? Started he to show signs of weakness ?

The haunting voices inside his head had made him step upon the ship and departing to Tyros, but even there they never silenced. Crow was to much killer to know the consequences if he would drop to his desires for love and companionship. Yet there was something in his mind; if he was able to find a safe haven for them to grow old together, he might finally let those voices rest. Perhaps he had grown to old to be the Master Assassin that many held him for.

He had, perhaps to keep busy and his mind occupied traveled to all kind of places and finally had found a little cottage in the Northernwoods far from any city that would perhaps discover his true name and caste. He could perhaps stay here … grow old as the voices as demons were telling him. When he had returned to Ayr, he had searched for Eve. Told her about his plans and without any time to consider it all she had accepted and would prepare for this journey that would make him vanish of the face of the planet, or make it seem that way.

While she was starting to prepare Crow had to keep busy, perhaps excited by the prospect of leaving … or perhaps guilty for failing his caste he took the task to explore a camp near Laura. His spies had told him there was seen a fire burning and Crow wanted to know who occupied this seemingly deserted camp.

[23:43] Crow stepped up, of course he had seen him from the distance his eyes narrowed “Like a true coward … hiding ?” he said growling low.

[23:43] Malikai Alecto’s eyes lift calmly to the other man, giving a nod toward tanye. ‘Hiding? In a known camp, in the open… if you all such a thing, hiding.’

[23:44] Alana Quicksand gasps as the familiar voice perces the darkness, the firelight wamrs her, though her body trembles, shivering in the firelight

[23:45] Crow nods “Many have believed this was a deserted camp … why would one think an known killer would venture here … if it weren’t for my spies that seemed to have spotted movement it might have been overlooked.” he said glancing to Tanya “I am sure your Master isn’t aware of your questionable loyality ?” he snarls.

[23:46] Malikai Alecto lifts his shoulder in a shrug. ‘Deserted… it is far better than a city, to my opinion and my desires at the moment. Your spies should do a better job. I have had the fire lit for weeks.’

[23:48] Alana Quicksand kneels close to the snowy Master, as lips part, eyes darting back and forth between the two men…”My Master, I have not seen him…I have been kept here, with …him, for so long, I-I do not know how ling it has been.” a soft whimper as she rubs the bruises from her frequent use…her eyes seeking the Master she had known in the village for so long, wondering if he caught her meaning

[23:49] Crow waved his hand dismissively “Don’t flatter yourself Snow … your not that important nor is a movement in a camp.” he remarks dryly. His own plans for moving out of Ayr with Eve were crossed because of this … as he had hoped to spend atleast two days here in hiding before heading off more deeper into the woods. He turns to Tanye his demeanor showed something was different about the man he now had become … tormented by demons of his own cold heart … “I see …”he merely offers as to dismiss the fact of her presence here.

[23:52] Malikai Alecto snorts. ‘You are the one prone to self-flattery, Crow, you always were. Come, sit… unless you are too powerful now for the hospitality of mere Killer, who is no longer Master Assassin of anywhere. Ah, and to make it a violation of codes, all around…’ One hand dips to his belt, drawing forth a small pebble, flicking it toward Crow as he speaks, his voice dripping with sarcasm. ‘I have taken a homestone. You may have it, if you like.’ His usual good humor is nowhere to be found. ‘So, shall we set aside these stupid differences, Brother, or shall we go on as we have for so long, to first blood or all the way to last this time?’

[23:55] Alana Quicksand drops her gaze to Snow’s boot, her own worth as a slave had ended she knew when Snow had kept her…her Master would think that she had run off she was sure. Looking up to Snow she begs softly, “May I offer service to the Master?” looking at the full cup of blackwine Snow had she was sure that he needed nothing at this time.

[23:56] Crow shook his head “In your mind I might be that one your bescribing … but I never underestimated anyone … not even you … you should know by now.” he stepped aside when the pebble was trown, eventhough Crow had been facing the darkest of times … he still had some humor when he finaly grins “I am not here to vengence or to continue afairs I feel have already been addressed.” he took a seat “But it isn’t hard to guess why you have taken up residence here … rumors go rapidly … – brother -. ” as if he wanted to give some hint to his knowledge.

[23:59] Malikai Alecto flicks his finger toward Tanye, head jerking toward Crow in silent command. Icey violet eyes lift to Crow’s form as he speaks, his tone as patient as ever. ‘Rumors of my death, I am sure, if things I arranged have gone to plan. However, if there are other rumors as to why I would be in Laura… I would truly enjoy hearing them. So please, do enlighten me as to the supposed cowardice smeared upon my name now.’

[23:59] Alana Quicksand remains within a hare’s breath of his boot, as she had been since the moment he had taken her from her trip to Laura. Snow had not allowed her a moment out of his sight since that time, keeping her chained when he slept, so she could not return to Sarus with his location. As she lifs to sweep over toward Crow she realizes that this is the first time she has been farther than a sword’s length from Snow as she rushes to Crow’s side

[0:00] Alana Quicksand softly breaths, “we have fresh milk, Master”

[0:02] Crow had rested his eyes on Tanye a slave that had shown the understanding of the deepness of slavery. A slave that had become a true asset to his caste brother of that he was sure. He turns to her his eyes just seem to soften for a brief moment when he nodded to her offer. She had remembered and he hadn’t expected anything less. “That it will be than.” he replied turning to Snow slowly “Your death … ah yes … for those fools that call them selves keepers of the safety of a city … little is needed to convince them of that kind of fact … however … I am sure you and I are to long on this planet to let us be fooled that easy.” he tipped his head in the direction of Laura “You know I am a man of facts … so … why Laura ?” he asks …

[0:05] Alana Quicksand listens to the voices she had known for so long and so well, serving them in the small village..her voice like the winde through the trees that surround them sighs, “yes Master’ as she rushes to find his bidding. her face turns once more to look back and forth between the two before beginning her task.

[0:05] Malikai Alecto’s gaze flicks to Tanye’s form, the bruises that decorated her a testament to the depth of his frustration, exorcised upon her slender form at his merest whim. His lips curved into a smile that could only be described as brutal as his gaze lifts to Crow once more. ‘Tell me, how is Rose? Still free?’ He does not directly answer the question, though his words might give some answer indirectly, never one to speak bluntly when his need to protect something precious to him was involved, a rare thing indeed.

[0:10] Crow arches a brow while he pulled down his mask, to regard Snow. Knowing him this long had it’s advantages as he knew how the man’s brain worked. But he wasn’t a fool … he suspected that Snow had the same advantage to him if it was needed. With the mentioning of his daughter …. his heart twisted in his chest … the haunting spirits of what he had thought to be a cold heart had made him understand it was far from the truth. Crow … the merciless killer had a heart and it had beaten strong for his daughter, his slave sparrow and with the love for Eve it had broken down on him “She is well from what I gather from my informants.” he tried to respond casually “Is that woman … Ceri in Laura … ?” he asks when he narrows his eyes as to read the facial expression of Snow.

[0:11] Alana Quicksand slides back to the Master’s side, suppressing the slight groan as as she folds her battered body into the graceful serving slave that she tried so hard to be, even now as she watches the Master’s closely, wondering if by some chance she can slip away while they are conversing on some pretext…lifting the vessal high above her head she softly intones,”your milk Master, it is my sincerest wish that it brings you health, as much as this one is thrilled to see you again, she is hoping that she has please you and in so doing has honored her Master”

[0:13] Crow turns to the lovely slave and reached for the vessel, his eyes roam her while he notices every bruise upon her. He regarded her with no shame … as a true master that assesses a slave on it’s beauty and attitude. She hadn’t yet dissapointed him much and while he took it his fingers brushed hers softly. A sign he used to show she had done well. “Is this your doing?” he asks snow while he indicated the slave and her signs of beatings.

[0:15] Malikai Alecto shrugs once more, lifting the paga bowl filled with blackwine to his lips, taking a long pull from it. ‘I enslaved Ceri, after she betrayed me. I left her collared and unattended in Salernum.’ He lifted a hand to indicate the city behind them. ‘My reasons for being here… are of another kind. There is a slavegirl, belonging to the administrator, her training amuses me to see.’ He spoke the words calmly, his own scarf now left to dangle around his neck, having dropped it down to drink. ‘Aye, it is my doing. Though it is doubtless not what you assume. It is not from beating her…it is from using her. I do not have to beat women, and believe you me, Crow… she dares not complain. She squirms well for me.’

[0:19] Alana Quicksand moans softly at his familiar touch …his fingers brushing over hers as familliar as her own skin. Hearing Snow’s words, the color rushes to her cheeks, painting her as the slut she is known by both of them, a toss of her long fine hair and her eyes seek Snow’s now uncovered features …for a change nt loaming over hers in the throws of…well as much passion as any Assassin will show. she remains at Crows boot, wondering if she will be dismissed, if she will have her chance…not knowing if her Masgter woujld kill her when she returned, but still, the need to be there..beyond anything she could have thought possible. And so, in silence, she waits.

[0:20] Crow frowns “I heard rumors about a young lady that was left in guard of the admin. “he ponders while he digged into his memory “Marcos … I believe he is called … a man long in his seat … quite remarkable for that station.”he muses … and it was true … for sure these two killers knew how easy a life would be taken of a ubar or admin due to the jealousy of others and the coin paid to serve their intentions. “I ve heard of this slave … “he replies … while suddenly something seemed to make contact in Crows brain … “She reminded me ….” he faces Snow … his eyes show his question … Crow wasn’t one for guessing games … but the thought he was having was rather odd. He nods to his answer of Tanye “She is a hot and needy a slave … I am sure she hasn’t failed to please you … as she never has done me.” with the last he glances to the slave … he did remember that night in Cardonicus well … even if his high numbers of fucks with slaves perhaps made her believe otherwise.

[0:26] Malikai Alecto’s eyes lift from the fire to Crow, acknowledgment of Crow’s question given with a simple nod, an answer as well before he speaks softly. ‘Her mother called her Luci. She has my good looks and Brooke’s natural charm. She is so charming in fact that she threw a goblet at the head of a free man, and later, from what I hear, a book at the head Markos himself. Doubtless it is a good match. He is as stubborn as she is.’ His eyes lower to Tanye, giving a nod. ‘My only complaint is that she is prone to screaming too loudly in her yielding. I often have to gag her to make sure she does not arouse suspicions. She sounds like a kur is eating her. But once stifled, she performs well enough.’

[0:31] Crow nods when his guess is turned in actual fact, rumors about the stubborness of the admin had reached his ears … Crow wasn’t judgmental when it came to men that took positions in cities, he only studied them as pottential marks … as often those were eventually paid for. He grins darkly at the mentioning of Tanye … remembering her screams for more when he took her for his use on the table of the tavern in Cardonicus. The mere thought stirred things inside of him, besides a killer he was still a man with natural needs. It had been long but soon he would have his again. “Childeren can be quite a challange Snow … I as no other know of this … “he replied …. his voice showing perhaps something Crow had become …

[0:34] Alana Quicksand’s thoughts drift to a time in Cardonicus, before the rivers had taken it from Gor…of the time wen the Master had taken her, a sinple village girl, with his own salve and used them both in the tavern while the free women left in a huff! The smiles that skittered over her lips at the memory of the Master and his lovely girl. Her brow lifts in query at the very thought, grumbling in her head about Master’s that never seem to know what they want, noise, no noise ow can a girl keep track when he rmind and body are elsewhere? Kur indeed. Her placid features do not betray her thoughts, though the color that deepens over her skin from head to toe betrays the fact that she is aware of the Master’s words, At the mention of Brooke, she offers a soft assent to his assessment of her personality. “The Mistress is always so soft spoken and kind, Master, until she percieves that she is provoked.’ Feeling Corws eyes upon her , her body responds so naturally it is without thought that the silken thighs spread even wide, back arches moer gracefully, she presents herself to him as the slut she is and the slut her Master has encouraged her to be. Serving the caste as if her life depends upon it, as surely ..it does.

[0:35] Malikai Alecto’s eyes narrow at the change in tone, his own growing icey in the next instant. ‘Do not think for a moment that the girl is not expendable. She, as much as anyone in this world, can be gone with only one stroke of my dagger, and it will be so if it comes to that.’ His eyes narrow a bit, his shoulders squaring. ‘You have grown weak, Crow… youlet your emotions creep into your tone. Best to watch yourself or it will be your throat that is next cut. I would regret having to see that happen.’ His eyes drop to Tanye. ‘Return to my boot, beast. You have been gone from it long enough.’

[0:39] Crow seemed to echo the expression of snow when his own eyes narrow “You sound like me … Snow … you might be able to hide in a camp as deserted as this … tell me words of childeren we can take with our own daggers as if we don’t care and yet you are here … seeing to her … are you not ?!” he replied coldly “What I am is without a doubt a killer that has served his caste for a long time … never have I gone missing … never have I faultered the tasks set to me.” his voice grew louder as if he was perhaps justifying himself along the way “I have trained many candidates … seen to it that they would be true assets to the caste that has given me fortune and taken any chance of peace …. ” he lifted his chin as if in to make a point “Don’t pretend it never tires you the same as it does me.”

[0:40] Alana Quicksand’s lips tighten for a moment as her eyes close to keep him from seeing her rolling them, her chance obviously gone. Floating to her feet drifting over to Snow’s side, she slips as close to him as possible without interfering with the possibility of his swift movement if it was needed, just as she had been trained..the warmth of his leg eminates through the cloth of his pantsleg to her cheek as she presses her lips to his thigh as he had taught her to do, breathing “yes Master”

[0:45] Malikai Alecto chukles dryly. ‘Of course it tires me, Crow. Why else would I fake my own death and walk away with nothing but my steel and enough coin to get me by? Of course I grow weary, I was exhausted. Don’t fool yourself into thinking I am here for the girl. She is a pleasurable diversion of my attention when I am not engaged in my trainee’s sessions. But it does not matter so much to be whether she lives or dies, no more than it matters to me whether Tanye here lives or dies.’ His voice holds a note of honesty, as though his innate compassion had finally died, seemingly having switched perspectives with Crow by some natural progression of events. ‘Aye, it tires me, but their lives mean very little. If you think that it is not so, then you delude yourself. None of them…’ He jerks his head toward the city as his hand moves to rest in Tanye’s hair. ‘Are worth more than a handful of gold.’

[0:49] Crow frowns hearing the words of his partner in crime during training, the irony of them being together in a city they had visited during it. The time had been pleasent and without much knowledge about the heartships that would follow after their acceptance within the caste. Both had worked hard, gained ranks quickly. He knew there had been voices about their reputation and the gold they both owned was more than enough sign that many feared to be their next target. “What I believe … or guess is of little importance … I am a man of facts and they seem rather plain.” he shrugs as if to dismiss the topic at hand, afterall if Crow would be honest it was his own torment at this given time. “So your training … he must have some talent … as I know our standards have gone high.”

[0:51] Alana Quicksand lifts to press against his fingers, head lolling to his hand so naturally as her whimper that escapes her parted lips floats over the crackling fire to Crow…eyes now closed in passion that were only moments before hiding her thoughts from him…all thought now driven from her in her slave’s need. Turning within the curve of his hand to press full lips to his palm. Teeth scrapping lightly over his skin. her mind drifts to the trainee she had seen and teased with the sounds that came from Snow’s tent each night, wondering what torments the young Master had suffered in hearing them.

[0:54] Malikai Alecto rises from the log, fingers drifting to Tanye’s hair, gripping it tightly as he drags her with him, reaching for the too-heavy chain used to secure her, clipping it to her collar. ‘The lad shows promise. Though he is prone to great cruelty, even by our standards. That is something however, he will learn to use to his advantage.’ He gripped Tanye by the hair tightly for a moment before tossing her toward Crow’s feet. ‘You may have her for the night, take my tent. I will sleep in Adlai’s.’

(to be continued)

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Using rank

Posted in Black Caste with tags captain, honour, Master Assassin, pride on December 21, 2009 by crow1971

Most know the lonely killer, lurking in the shadows. The one that doesn’t sit down for pleasant conversations about the weather or the new bought slave. They have this tendency to only be there, listening and observing while others seem to busy them selves with things of ordinary life. This vision of a killer, might suit me when you encounter me in the streets of Salernum, Laura, Lydius or any other place a mark might take me.

However when I am in the comfort of the compound you might see a more relaxed man, one that might joke, tells stories. A man that feels the same amount of pride in his new bought slave, or accomplished task. The compound is a well organized place, where each knows his place, the slaves busy with the things that need to be done, candidates do their study or work on their progression.

To keep this place organized we keep a very strict order on discipline and rank. The Master Assassin our general, that delegates and gives a final say in the decisions that need to be made. The captain that again delegates, works on several things to keep order in what at times seems chaos. He might be the one that knows of what goes on, sees to it that only the important matters reach the Master Assassin and is there to teach candidates or guides them to those killers that can.

A rank has it’s privileges, but also the heartship. The Master Assassin, lots of scrolls, political issues to deal with and me the one that sees a candidate overstep his lines or a killer behaving poorly. Things that will be addressed and not with velvet gloves. The times a candidate was simply beaten to unconsciousness because he ordered paga, to many to count. The Killer beaten with sticks for falling in love and acting out on those feelings in an ill manner to large to even count on my fingers.

We are all human, making mistakes and those will not be covered by silk but will be exposed and dealt with in the same order and discipline.

I always strive to be fair, straight forward, perhaps harsh and demanding but nevertheless fair. I don’t try to be guided by my own feelings of anger, disappointment or disliking. Everyone that will cross lines that I have set will see the same treatment or so I hope.

Aware of my harsh reputation, aware of my mindplay, aware of my bad jokes, aware of what still has remained as this believe in honour and also aware of the burden of using a rank.

Gold and Steel

Crow

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Killing with respect

Posted in Black Caste with tags kill woman respect on November 26, 2009 by crow1971

Perhaps it is hard to understand that a man such as I is able to kill, even though the mark might be very well someone I admire or respect. It doesn’t bring me doubt, it doesn’t make me pause, however it does make me wish to go at perhaps a greater length to make it honourable and a worthy ending.

My last mark seemed to be the most cunning woman I have ever encountered. The fact I found her was merely luck as I happened to overhear a conversation which made me more curious about this lady. When she finally was in the corner I wished her to be in order of my client she trusted me completely with all the details of her life. She wasn’t scared but rather at peace, perhaps because she for the first time knew that whatever would come wasn’t something she could escape.

When I took her life by the will of another I could understand their wish and I could understand why she had become the woman she was. In this world there is no fairness, there is just Gold and Steel.

If there would be such a thing as a woman being an assassin, she might have made many killers go in her shadow as she was certainly cunning enough and had been escaping her fate more than once.

Why she allowed me to have this insight I will never know … but when she died by my blade … she died by someone who admired her for the woman she had been. Not in ways of justice or right or wrong, but simply for what she was : A woman with skill, cunningness, charm, spirit and most important a soul that truly tried to live.

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Fear

Posted in Black Caste, Mastery with tags death, emotions, life, sephi on November 8, 2009 by crow1971

Emotions are things we learn to control, to place somewhere deep where they won’t show or play a part in how we conduct ourselves. I am sure many people wonder if Killers still feel since there is hardly anything showing. How little do they know of the constant battle that many killers fight when they truly wish to stay within their codes and wish to remain safe. Each sign of care could be used against one, any sign of fear could be exploited.

Being a killer and having endured pain, torture, loss but also love, joy and commitment will need to learn to stay cold to the outside world. If I let myself be guided by a single ihn of fear I might lose my life. A plain fact which is one that is a constant point of attention when lads follow the training to become of the caste. A moment of anger, disappointment, impatience and your instantly punished severely.

Years have gone by and with each year it seemed to come more easy. Perhaps with each year the age helped me to become more distant to those feelings that so many Gorean men celebrate daily.

My emotions are deep ebbed within me, the fear of facing an enemy as the Kurri. The fear of losing my girl Sephi because some fellow wished to steal her. Those emotions are hidden, covered up by harshness and demands. They might play a role when I am alone with my thoughts but during any interaction in public they are lifeless almost non-existent.

Writing down this I realize that I even though old, and perhaps faced with numbers of difficult quests I still wish to better myself, learn more, so I will be able to keep on the side that wins. The side that kept his wits and coolness and defeats his demons, his battles based on skills.

I might be the cold heartless killer in your eyes, but in my dreams I am still living with the same emotions as any other has. The only difference is the iron control and the realization that those same emotions can make the difference between life and death.

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Words to live by

Posted in Mastery with tags master, quotes, slave on November 2, 2009 by crow1971

Some quotes from the scrolls, that are deeply valued by myself. I believe that these truly give meaning to the Mastery or Slavery in Gor. Even though I might be a killer, uncaring and calculated some things are undoubtedly part of who I am.

“Do you know, ultimately,” I asked, “who will prove to be your one best trainer?” “No, Master,” she said. “You, yourself,” I said, “the girl, herself, eager to please, imaginative and intelligent, monitoring her own performances and feelings, striving lovingly to improve and refine them. You yourself will be largely responsible for making yourself the superb slave you will become.” ~Page 210 – Savages of Gor

“How can a girl who is only a slave be of interest?” she asked.
“Your question is foolish” I said. “all men desire a slave or slaves, it is their nature. Thus, that a woman is a slave, even in itself, makes her extraordinarily interesting. Her slavery itself, apart from her intelligence or beauty, is found extremely provocative and exciting to a male, because of his nature.” ~Page 274 – Beasts of Gor

“Once a girl truly understands that she is a slave, and there is no escape for her, once she understands it truly, emotionally, categorically, intellectually, physiologically, totally, deeply, profoundly, in every cell in her beautiful body, a fantastic transformation occurs in her. She then knows she is truly a slave. She then becomes wild and free, and sexual, and cares not that she might be scorned by the free either for her miserable condition or helpless appetites; she knows she will be what she must; she has no choice; she is slave” ~Page 55 – Beasts of Gor

“One of the pleasant things about owning a slave,” I said, “is the opportunity to converse with her, to listen to her, to hear her express herself, her feelings and ideas. One can learn much from a slave. Many slaves, like yourself, are highly intelligent. They can express themselves articulately, clearly, trenchantly, and lyrically. It is a great pleasure to talk with them. Then when one wishes,” I said, “one puts them again on their knees.” ~Page 203 – Beasts of Gor

“It is not uncommon for masters to pride themselves on the depth with which they know their slave girls; this depth is far greater in my opinion than that with which the average husband of Earth knows his wife; the slave girl is not simply someone with whom the man lives; she is very special to him; she is a treasured possession; he owns her; he wants to know profoundly and deeply, the background, history, the mind, the intelligence, the appetites, the nature and dispositions of his lovely article of property; this knowledge, of course, puts her more at his mercy; by making it possible for him to manipulate her feelings, exploit weaknesses, drop asides, etc., she in the helpless condition of slavery, it gives him greater power over her. For example, it is common for a master to force his girl to speak at length and in detail to him of the secret sides of her nature, explaining and elaborating on her fantasies; if she is literate, she may be forced, naked and collared, on her knees at a small table, sometimes with her ankles shackled, to write them out; this supplies the master, of course, with abundant materials which may be used by him to make her further and more helplessly his; sometimes the girl attempts to deceive the master; it is not difficult to detect in authenticity in such matters; she is then beaten; too, she may be at times ordered to invent fantasies, sometimes of a certain type; these, too, for she has invented them, are, to an astute master, instructive; these intellectual, emotional exercises, performed by the girl under the condition of slavery, particularly if coupled with an enforced exercise regime, posing under male surveillance, and such, can do much to sensitize her to her collar; they awaken her body, and, of equal importance for the Gorean, though not for the Earthling, who sees sex with the perception of a hippopotamus, as a matter of body rubbings, her fantastic imagination and mind; she becomes curious, soon, about the deeper implications of what she is, a mere article of her master’s property; then, with authority, with assurance and power, to the depth and height of her mind and imagination she is taught; the slave girl experiences a paradox of freedom; the free woman is physically free, but miserable, fighting to be what she is not; the slave girl, physically in bondage, even to the collar, sometimes chains, is given no choice by men but to be totally and precisely what she is, slave; such women, slaves, interestingly, are almost always joyful and vital; they are paradoxically, in their feelings and emotions, liberated; they are not pinched, not psychologically restrained; why this should be I do not know; to see such women , their heads held high, their eyes bright, their bodies , movements, beautiful, as no earth woman would dare to be, is quite pleasurable; some of them are so insolent, so proud of their collars, that I have cuffed them to my feet, to remind them that they are only slaves.” ~Pages 42 – 43 – Tribesmen of Gor

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Relationships

Posted in Black Caste with tags companion, family, friend, partner on October 19, 2009 by crow1971

In my past there have been all kind of relationships, that were important to me. The first my parents, my brothers and sisters, of course. But later even a companion and my own children. I even had friends, people I felt a bond with and people who I trusted. When my companion and children were killed, I felt alone and without any ties with others. Perhaps the perfect moment to be recruited for the Black Caste.

When I had to redo my training in the hochburg mountains I was partnered with a man who became more friend, then I wanted or ever held possible. A brother, one that shared the stress of waiting, the pain of all the severe beatings, the thrill of passing an other task. We both knew that at one given moment one would have to kill the other, but somehow we managed to keep that as far from us both as possible. When the moment arrived I think we both fought with tears in our eyes.

Perhaps I may seem as the cold and merciless killer, that has lost any kind of feelings for an other. If that is so there is much truth in it, after giving my partner the final blow and claiming his life I never have felt so cold, so lifeless or all by myself.

The relationships I have now, aren’t based on this solemn trust, sharing of joy, pain or frustrations. They are based on respect and complete understanding that at any given moment it can turn and it will be his or hers against my own life.

This and only this, makes me wary to get to deep in relationships as they might be a danger to my own life in time. It doesn’t mean I don’t care, wouldn’t fight for those I care for now. But the depth of these relationships is as far as gold can reach it.

Gold and Steel … that is all there is.

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Slave values

Posted in Mastery with tags communicate, learn, sephi, slave on October 17, 2009 by crow1971

The value of a slave isn’t that hard to measure. She is allowed to be at your feet or she is to be sold or killed. There is not much in between. Perhaps a slaver might have shades of grey when it comes to slaves, but for me there isn’t. I don’t want to busy myself with fighting a girl’s slavery. She can accept her place and do what she is told and be kept, or she can fight her place and be sold or killed.

I am certain this might seem harsh, perhaps even cruel but she is merely a slave, nothing more and nothing less. She is to be replaced at the first thought I might have on it. However the fact a slave can be at my feet, means she is valued and considered worthy. Perhaps for some that might be a reason to think she is still nothing, but nothing is more wrong.

As an assassin I am very careful who I allow to be this close, only those I consider to be on my good side I allow. The girl I own is unique and considered precious, since she is allowed to sit and observe almost anything I encounter. The only place she will never see is the place I take when I am on my hunt for a Mark. Not that she might not be able to contribute in a way, but simply because I value my slave too much to endanger her during the most dangerous moment of my life and caste.

My girl Sephi was purchased as a lure girl, she had been trained well in the compound by the first girl. Her beauty, seductive and intelligence make me perhaps a very fortunate owner, since I hardly have to discipline her for doing things I wouldn’t approve off. She has been my girl for some time and every time she amazes me with her personality.

She is valued, untill she bores or displeases me. Although I doubt she will ever will get to that stage since she seem to understand that she can always seek my guidance for learning what I wish to see in her.

Perhaps Mastery is also about communication, being able to make them feel secure enough to speak without being to frightened, eventhough she has all the reasons to be scared. After all I deside if she lives or dies.

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Ranks

Posted in Black Caste with tags captain, lieutenant, Master Assassin, rank on October 13, 2009 by crow1971

Never have I felt that I needed to have some sort of rank, to know who I was or what I was about. When I was approached to be Lieutenant I was honoured, perhaps in a way felt acknowledged for what I did in training those that were in the guild. I have taken it and carried it as it was, a mere sign that some of the tasks were coming my way. The rank didn’t make me different, they didn’t show me that I was better it only showed others what they could expect from me.

When I received the rank of captain, it was in many ways the same way. The rank on itself only a position, with more demands and responsibility. Nothing more and nothing less, as far I am concerned.

However with the rank I understood that some might take me as an example and became therefor more aware that my knowledge and act should be flawless.

I know that the next rank might be Master Assassin, a rank many killers wish to achieve or even claim. In my humble opinion often to early and unaware that this rank is for those that will be judged severely when they act badly or breach the codes. Nothing after that rank will come and only those that are the best in the caste should hold that position.

For now I don’t feel I can hold it in the same glory as Serpent or Sol do. I even feel that when they still breath, although the breath of Sol might be no longer, there is no reason for me to even consider the claim of that rank.

I serve the Cast, the gold and Steel, in the best of my abilities and as long as I am allowed and until the position become vacant, I won’t make my claim. If and I hope the time will be far in the future that this position becomes vacant I can only say that the caste would be served best if the spot would be filled with that killer that is the best for it at that time.

So when you see me … call me captain … as the rank is well earned and carried with its burdens and obligations, but don’t see me as a Master Assassin, since that moment has not yet arrived.

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Revenge

Posted in Black Caste with tags mentor, revenge on October 8, 2009 by crow1971

No Killer will admit it as it is one of those emotions that might trouble ones view on facts, still I can feel it at times. The sweetness of just settling the score, making someone pay for doing you harm.

It is one of those emotions that I hardly feel, but ever since I heard the news about one of my mentors I feel it running trough my veins. The one that guided me to become what I am now seems to be closer to me than perhaps the knowledge that a killer shouldn’t be guided by something as this.

It is all about containing it, being aware of the monster that lives within yourself … not to distract me from what I am but using it to make amends. Can a killer even with this emotion be cunning, sharp, calculated and most deadly ? I think he can and perhaps in the very near future I can be sure.

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